Big Feelings - Fear

Transcript of the sermon preached by Pastor Shawn Coons on March 26, 2023

This is our final week in our big feelings series, and we're going to talk about fear this week as our final emotion, as we've got happiness and anger and sadness. What am I missing? No, happiness, anger, sadness. Oh, there was an intro week. There we go. I'm like, "There's an emotion I preached on and I don't remember it at all." If I can't remember what I say, how can I expect you to? So there we are.

So we're talking about fear this week, and as we approach Easter, as we get towards the events of Holy Week, Palm Sunday and Maundy Thursday and Good Friday, and those last hours of Jesus, starting to get closer to that story, starting to reflect a little bit. In a moment, we're going to read the story of Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane, which takes place after the Last Supper. That's where Jesus prays that, "Can there be another way, God? Do I have to go through with this?" It's always been for me a powerful passage, a very moving passage. I've felt as I read it, and sometimes there are movie versions of it that bring it out very well, but I felt the grief in there that Jesus has at that moment. I felt the worry that Jesus has at that moment.

But until I started preparing for the sermon this week, I had never really thought about that story in terms of the fear that Jesus must be feeling at that moment. And as I started to reflect on that, well, obviously He's worried, He's stressed, but I've never really thought of Him as afraid. I'm like, well, why haven't that thought occurred to me? And I wonder if it's partially because it's troubling to think of Jesus as afraid. I wonder if that's troubling because that leads us to the next step, well, can God be afraid? So I want to ask that question and we're going to unpack it as we move along. Is it troubling for you to believe in Jesus or a God who can be afraid?

Keeping this lens of fear in our mind, let's hear our gospel lesson this morning. Matthew 26, starting with verse 36. "Then Jesus went with them to a place called Gethsemane, and He said to His disciples, 'Sit here while I'll go over there and pray.' And He took with him, Peter and the two sons of Zebedee, and He began to be grieved and agitated, and He said to them, 'I am deeply grieved even to death. Remain here and stay awake with Me.' And going a little farther, He threw himself on the ground and prayed, 'My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from Me. Yet not what I want, but what You want.' Then He came to the disciples and He found them sleeping, and He said to Peter, 'So could you not stay awake with Me one hour? Stay awake and pray that you may not come into the time of trial. The spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak.'"

Again, He went away for the second time and prayed, 'My Father, if this cannot pass unless I drink it, Your will be done.' And again, He came and found them sleeping, for their eyes were heavy. So leaving them again, He went away and He prayed for the third time saying the same words. Then He came to the disciples and said to them, 'Are you still sleeping and taking your rest? See the hour is at hand, the Son of Man is betrayed into the hands of sinners. Get up, let us be going. See, my betrayer is at hand.'" This is the word of the Lord.

Thanks be to God.

So let's back up a little bit. Let's walk through this passage, where it fits into the night, Jesus' final night before His crucifixion. The passage, it begins just as the Jewish Passover begins, as this festival, this ritual, begins. And Passover is an ancient Jewish tradition. It's still practiced to this day. Many of the same practices are done as have been done for millennia.

And one part of the ritual of the Passover dinner, the Seder dinner, is reading from the Psalms. Some certain sections of the Psalms are read every year, year after year. I wonder though if Jesus could really focus on those words, on the ritual of the Passover, knowing what was ahead of Him. I want you to think of a time where you have had something coming up very soon that you're not looking forward to, that you're fearful of, that you're worried about. Maybe it's confessing up to a mistake, like you have to share with someone how you kind of let them down or something that happened and you don't want to tell them. Maybe you're sitting on bad news and you don't know how you're going to be able to tell your family member, a coworker, a friend, a classmate. Maybe it's the night before you go into surgery.

Something is coming up and you're worried and you're scared, but you still have to go through with daily life, to go through your job, you have to go through classes, go through sitting down to meals with folks. I think this is where Jesus was at this moment. He knew what was ahead, maybe not in every last detail, but He knew generally what was coming. But it was the Passover. It was with the disciples. They were expecting Him to kind of lead them through this ritual. And so He did. But as He broke bread, He was probably thinking, "What's up next?" And maybe there was some worry and maybe there was some fear as He poured the cup. He was anxious. Maybe His hand trembled a little bit.

As He washed his disciples feets as it says in John, scared of what the next day would bring. And so it's in this state of mind that Jesus is hearing these Psalms read at the Passover meal. And some of the words from those Psalms are the words that Rick read just a moment ago from Psalm 118. This is verse five and six, "Out of my distress, I called on the Lord. The Lord answered me and set me in a broad place. With the Lord on my side, I do not fear. What can mortals do to me?" With the Lord on my side, I do not fear. I wonder how Jesus heard those words on this night. Was it reassuring? Were they words of comfort? "With the Lord on my side, I do not fear." Or was it a gut punch to a Jesus who was afraid?

During the Passover, He shares that one of the disciples is going to betray Him. Then after they leave the supper, as they head to the Garden of Gethsemane, Jesus shares, "You know what? You're all going to desert me. You will all become deserters of me this night,"" Jesus says to them. Peter protests, he says, "Not me Lord. Never going to leave you." And Jesus tells him, "Not once, Peter, but three times you're going to deny even knowing me." And so this is how Jesus comes to the Garden of Gethsemane. He comes grieved. He comes fearful of what is to come. He goes there knowing His closest companions, who have been with Him every step of the way these last three years, they are all going to scatter. None of them are going to be there when He needs them most. "With the Lord on my side, I do not fear." What do these words mean to Jesus at this time when He has every reason to be afraid?

We've talked about our emotions during this series. Fear is one of those emotions. And we said there's no good emotions, there are no bad emotions. Fear serves a good purpose in our life. It tells us something is out there and you should be paying attention. Something is out there that could be threatening your wellbeing. There is nothing wrong with being afraid. It is not a sign of weakness. I would suggest to you that there are some people actually who could use more fear. I read this week a story of these two pilots who were working with Red Bull, that energy drink, to do this stunt where each one would go up in their plane, they would put their planes into nose dives together right near each other. They would each exit their plane. They had a parachute on their back, but they would try and swap planes as they're falling, and their planes are falling. One of the pilots made it to the other plane. The other pilot did not. He parachuted out and was safe. The plane was not. Some people could use more fear in their life.

We lift up fearlessness in our society, but it serves a good purpose. Maybe one reason we don't like the image of a God, of a Jesus, who can be afraid can be because we have bought into this sign that being afraid is a sign of weakness. And so we are, ironically, scared to reveal our own fears. I want to question, a question for you to think about real quickly. When was the last time you shared your fears with someone else? Just think about that for a moment. When was the last time you shared what you are afraid of with someone else?

We've been reading through the book This Here Flesh by Cole Arthur Riley, and she writes, "For something at the root of so much of human behavior, it is rare that we ever truly behold another person's fear. So many of us express our fear in ways that only serve to mask it. In conflict we may see anger or hate or apathy, but it is much more difficult to perceive fear in a person. It's even more difficult to name it. Yet fear stalks so much of our words and actions and even loves." How alone do you feel in your fear? How comfortable are you sharing your fears with other people? Let me flip the question a little bit. Can you think of a time someone close to you shared their fears with you? How did that make you feel? Trusted? Important? It is a gift to be able to have someone who sees in you something that says, "I am safe to share my fears with you." It doesn't make the fear go away, but it makes it easier to bear.

Another quote from Cole Arthur Riley, "Find those who tell you do not be afraid, yet they stay close enough to tremble with you. This is a love." Reflecting on fear in this way, let's look back at Jesus in the Garden, praying with all His being, with everything He is, praying to God, "Let this cup pass from me. God, I don't want to do it. If there's another way, let's find that way." And He goes to his friends, looking for some support in this hour. But they can't stay awake. They are so tired. I don't know what stresses they are under, but they just are unable to stay awake with Jesus. Three times this happened. Three times He goes to them for support. I mean, who knows? Maybe this would've kept happening over and over again if Judas hadn't shown up with the soldiers at that moment. I don't think Jesus got over His fear. I don't think God calls us to get over our fear. We're called to move forward, fear and all. Not get over it. Not erase it. Just move forward with the fear.

Oftentimes, if we think about what are we afraid of? What's the root of our fear? And sometimes we go, "Well, I'm afraid the worst is going to happen. I'm going to afraid that this situation is going to go down this road and it's going to be an awful. And the worst thing I can possibly think of will happen." If we think through, usually the worst won't happen. Oftentimes, the worst can't happen. And usually the worst does not happen. But let's also be honest, sometimes the worst does happen. Jesus feared the worst and the worst happened to Jesus, but He still moved forward. And even if the worst happens, even if our fears are realized, we move forward.

How do we move forward? Well, there's lots of different ways, and then sometimes time helps. But I'm going to come back to kind of our lessons that we've been trying to learn during this series. One way of move forward is simply naming the fear, naming the feeling. "I'm afraid. That's what I'm feeling right now. I'm trembling, I'm short of breath." Name the physical sensations that go along with that feeling. Share the fear. I think that's what I'm convicted of most as I was getting ready for this, is we keep our fears to ourselves way too much, maybe more than any other emotion. Sharing the fear. Find those who tell you, "Do not be afraid," yet stay close enough to tremble with you.

So here's your homework for today. Share a fear with someone, today, this week. And it can be a small thing. If you want to share, "I'm afraid of clowns," share that. If you want to share something that's been weighing on you heavily, and you find that person, you have that person in your life that you trust, share that fear. Let people help you. Invite people into your life.

Let me leave you this morning, as our closing prayer, a blessing from Kate Bowler. "God, I feel afraid. My heart is melting like wax. God save me and quiet my fears. Hold me when I feel there is no place to stand. God have mercy. Christ have mercy. Spirit have mercy. Blessed are we who admit, 'God we're afraid.' Blessed are we who confess, 'We don't know how to rest.' You know our anxious minds. You fill our restless hearts. You promise us Your presence, the quiet of Your love, God. You say, 'Come away with Me and I will give you rest.' God have mercy. Christ have mercy. Spirit have mercy. Breathe. Settle on this truth. Our God is closer than air." Amen.